REGRET
Philippians 4:8 (English Standard Version)
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
I wish there was an easy fix-it for regret, but there isn't. The only answer is to look to Christ's example. If He died for our sins and God has forgiven us and put them out of His mind, then we must also forgive ourselves and put our transgressions out of our mind. If we don't we are as good as sinning because if we do not forgive ourselves that is as good as saying that what we know is better than what God knows to do.
This past weekend, I drove to Mississippi and attended a wedding with a friend. I had never met the bride and had met the groom only once before. I spent the reception and a couple hours afterwards with my friend's friends. After about 5 hours I parted with this group feeling like I had 6 new friends that I had known for much longer than 5 hours; the parting was complete with warm regards and heartfelt embraces and it got me to thinking. Only in Christian community had I been received this way. How many other situations with strangers would you leave with smiles and hugs all around?
It also makes me kind of sad how hidden this kind of fellowship can be to 'the world' that does not know Christ's command to love as God loves (maybe Christianity wouldn't be so off-putting to those that disagreed with moral or political stances of the church if they knew the church's love first). Even more mournful are the Christians who do not experience this. I believe that loneliness plagues humanity. It is not discriminating; it affects everyone regardless of who they are, what they believe or their outward appearance. It doesn't save itself for those who are single either. It can be very present in even the most loving marriages.
Week 8
What causes loneliness? Is it always bad? Is there a way to combat it?
I wish there was an easy fix-it for regret, but there isn't. The only answer is to look to Christ's example. If He died for our sins and God has forgiven us and put them out of His mind, then we must also forgive ourselves and put our transgressions out of our mind. If we don't we are as good as sinning because if we do not forgive ourselves that is as good as saying that what we know is better than what God knows to do.
This past weekend, I drove to Mississippi and attended a wedding with a friend. I had never met the bride and had met the groom only once before. I spent the reception and a couple hours afterwards with my friend's friends. After about 5 hours I parted with this group feeling like I had 6 new friends that I had known for much longer than 5 hours; the parting was complete with warm regards and heartfelt embraces and it got me to thinking. Only in Christian community had I been received this way. How many other situations with strangers would you leave with smiles and hugs all around?
It also makes me kind of sad how hidden this kind of fellowship can be to 'the world' that does not know Christ's command to love as God loves (maybe Christianity wouldn't be so off-putting to those that disagreed with moral or political stances of the church if they knew the church's love first). Even more mournful are the Christians who do not experience this. I believe that loneliness plagues humanity. It is not discriminating; it affects everyone regardless of who they are, what they believe or their outward appearance. It doesn't save itself for those who are single either. It can be very present in even the most loving marriages.
Week 8
What causes loneliness? Is it always bad? Is there a way to combat it?
posted by Mrs. Harmon @ 12:17 PM
3 Comments:
We did a bible study last Spring about spiritual habits. One of those was solitude, and it really impacted me. Our culture tends to avoid solitude: people fill silence with background noise like TVs and radios, people hate those "awkward silences," so much that they fill the silence with ridiculous "awkward turtle" hand motions, or proceed to fill the silence with verbal output that doesn't have much substance at all. We hate admitting that we're lonely. We go into a relationship that isn't right, just so we're not "alone."
Loneliness is tough, but I think it's essential. If we can get past the earthly feelings of being alone, I think solitude can teach us a lot about how awesome God is and how He loves us, not for what we do or what we achieve, not because others love us and have a high opinion for us, but because He created us and simply loves us, no strings attached.
This link aboout solitude is pretty interesting if you have time:
http://www.chosunjournal.com/solitude.html
If you think of loneliness as a kind of suffering...
"I now rejoice in my sufferings for you, and fill up in my flesh what is lacking in the afflictions of Christ, for the sake of His body, which is the church..." (Col. 1:24, NKJV)
There has always been a "theology of glory" that teaches that God wants us to be happy, wealthy, fulfilled in our jobs, and generally never to suffer. But if our suffering points us (and/or others) to Christ, then God is glorified in our suffering. God was at the same time humiliated and glorified on the cross. So our humbling situations can at the same time glorify God.
Christ often departed in solitude to pray. He took on human suffering to the fullest, so I know He experienced loneliness. When we feel lonely, can this somehow bring God glory? I'm still thinking about how that works...
Isaiah 53:2-3
"...He has no form or comeliness;
And when we see Him,
There is no beauty that we should desire Him.
He is despised and rejected by men,
A Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief.
And we hid, as it were, our faces from Him;
He was despised, and we did not esteem Him."
Rejected by the people He came to save! "But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Rom. 5:8)
Going along with the lonliness as suffering theme... one of my favorite passages in the Bible is Romans 5:3-5, which is always so encouraging to me; a reminder that God works best in us in the times we need Him most, and He loves us too much to just let us go along all hunky-dory all the time:
3Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.
I think that loneliness is instilled in us by God, but like everything, has been corrupted by the fall. I believe that God created us with a longing for Him, a desire to know Him intimately. But apart from Christ we can't -- we are cut off from God forever. And what we are left with is this aching deep in our soul, a desperate longing for love, to know and to be known...
God is the only one who can fill this void, but of course that doesn't stop us from seeking it elsewhere. And as Christians we are somewhere in between... where we know the love of Christ, and yet we can still feel the intense aching, the sting of longing, because we still live in a fallen world. But like Derek pointed out, we can take comfort in the knowledge that even Jesus, who is One with the Father, experienced it too. And the suffering of loneliness indeed points to the cross.
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